04.12.2011.
“You can feel God through your fingertips. God is invisible.”
The teacher of Mohammad in the “Color of Paradise” told the blind boy so.
A little girl had certain kind of disease and lost all her
hair on her head. Yet, she struck me with constant smiles on her face. She is
in the middle school. I bet her classmates gave her some hard time.
My friend, S, is looking for a job, given her current work
will be terminated this June. As a wise woman, she fills her schedule with
fellowship meetings. Her usual meekness surprises me.
Am I taking things for granted? Am I discontent because of
my greediness? Have I given God thanks when I am so busy asking for things I do
not have yet? Is my humanity my excuse, or my starting point?
The film was over. D woke up finding me in tear. “Is it
really that sad?” I attempted to tell him the story while sobbing.
I guess in some way, Mohammad finally found his role model
on earth, the blind carpenter who learned carpentering from his carpenter
father. Mohammad’s loving granny died. When the prospective marriage of Mohammad’s
father fell through, he finally reconciled (at least I would like to think so)
and came to take Mohammad home. God had mercy on the little boy. On his way
home, after heavy rain in the village, the wood bridge could not bear the
weight of the horse and the boy and fell apart. Mohammad was flooded away. What
went through the father’s mind? After a few moments of being stunned, he jumped
into the water, trying to fetch his miserable little boy with failure and ending
at the downstream. Mohammad was finally home. God took him home eventually.
Is it sad because the blind little boy could not experience
many wonders in this world? That is not what made me tearful. Humanity is.
I used to think commitments matter a whole lot. I still
think so. But I also came to realize the extreme limitation of human being—emotional
needs and fear. Mohammad’s father felt tired of taking care of others while his
needs were not met. Even with two sweet and obedient girls and a hard working
mother, he was constantly worried that someday when he was sick and weak, no
one could take care of him. His father died early, and his wife died early, and
he had a blind boy. How much I want to pray for this man?
“We are so busy looking for the newly opened door, we miss
the open window!” Pastor Cory from L.A.
shared a few weeks ago.
“You are blessed to be a blessing!” The speaker at World
Mandate event this past Sunday proclaimed.
“Oh God, please do not let me take you for granted. Convict
my heart! Humble me!” I prayed. I know not what the paradise looks like. But in
my meditation, the color of a blessing is joy, laughter, contentment, and
peace. May your eyes see the color.
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