What scares married women most in marriages is to deal with the in-laws. Parents-in-law, brothers-in-law, sisters-in-law and even the extended ones!! Fitting in the couplehood after being married is tough enough, since there may be tons of things to compromise and needed to be negotiated with. Every little piece in life needs to be reconstructed eversince you become someone's wife or someone's husband.
Things from the household-cleaning to friend's socializing and to the family reunions, especially the holiday celebrating. Where to and what gift to buy on Mother's day and Father's day? How to convey the differences when your in-laws get their hands into the personal life of you 2?
All and all may dread a soft heart, but it definitely agitates a solid one to madness!
I belong to the latter kind!! I hate people get their hands in my life and the decision I have in mind, what angers me more is knowing someone bugging the 2 of us with our life.
However, with a bunch of in-laws around. It's hard to have a quiet and non-disturbed life. Every once in a while, I'll receive phone calls from some frantic in-law brainwashes me with something they believe or adore. Either they'll tell me how I should live my life, or about what I should buy to enrich my health!!!
< When one chose direct-marketing to be their life career, they simply can grow their vine all over the family>
I often wonder why I kept my courtesy for? To show them I was nice, or to show them the respects? Or what else? To play dumb so I could keep a decent relationship with them?
Maybe the last one!!! What about those who dare to show how they really are in the face of their in-laws? I really admire those!!
Despite the advices experts promote on and on on their books, I never fully second those guidelines.
They never put their feet in the shoes of those who are naturally introveted or socially inward. What if someone who can never show their affection out verbally or in action? What about those who are shy in words and can't sugarcoat their expressions?
To preserve the quality of my life, I leave the thorny issues to my husband. It's his family that he knows best about!
However, there's a weird spot, sometime they text me to say something I have no clue about but feeling I was the one to blame.
If one of my family member were ill, I am sure, I would receive the news from my family directly. Because I am the one that knows the family member best, so I will sure to feel upset about the news or else.
So, here is it, I received this text from my in-law saying that grandpa was admited to the hospital, which we had no clue about. Even though my husband called his parents almost every week, his mom was always feeling reluctant to mention anything regarding the in-law of hers. <that's a long story>
Therefore, to know grandpa was staying the hospital for almost a week was somehow a shocking news to us.
When I received the text---the text was "Grandpa is in the hospital, do you know that? Call and send your greeting!"
Hello!! What's it about? I felt offended!!!
Of course, we didn't know about it!! How did we know if no one mentioned? Plus, telling us to send out greeting was not only crossing the line, but was also like juding our behavior before we knew what's going on?
What I am trying to say here is " Please respect us and keep your distance!!"
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