lt turned out that he wasn’t in love with me like l thought.
What l’m trying to say is,
l understand feeling as small and as insignificant as humanly possible,
and how it can actually ache in places that you didn’t know you had inside you,
and it doesn’t matter how many new haircuts you get,
or gyms you join or how many glasses of chardonnay you drink with your girlfriends,
you still go to bed every night,
going over every detail,
and wonder what you did wrong,
or how you could have misunderstood.
And how in the hell, for that brief moment,
you could think that you were that happy?
And sometimes you can even convince yourself that he’ll see the light and show up at your door.
(SlGHS)
And after all that,
however long all that may be,
you’ll go somewhere new,
and you’ll meet people who make you feel worthwhile again,
and little pieces of your soul will finally come back.
And all that fuzzy stuff,
those years of your life that you wasted,
that will eventually begin to fade.
－ words by Iris from 《the Holiday》
我想說的是，
我了解那種渺小又微不足道的感受，
就算遍體鱗傷也要故作堅強，
不管換了幾個新髮型，
或是去健身、和姊妹淘喝白酒，
卻還是會在夜深人靜的時候，
躺在床上回想著每個細節，
納悶自己到底哪裡錯了，
或是哪裡誤解了。
最後自問怎麼會把短暫的歡愉，
錯當成永久的快樂?
有時候也會說服自己，
他會想清楚回來的。
經歷過這一切後，
人還是會重新開始，
再遇到值得付出的人，
然後一點一點地重拾自信，
而那些模糊的回憶，
那麼多年浪費掉的人生，
終究會開始消逝。
－ 愛麗絲 《戀愛沒有假期》
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